This blog post is for those 13 years old or older only. Please get your parents’ permission to read this if you are under 18.

Here are 3 Reasons I have found Why Many Homosexuals Don’t Like Christians

1) Identity

The bible is designed to help us gain a sense of identity.  That is to understand our position as a Child of the Most High God.  Homosexuals have placed their complete sense of person, value and worth in the act of homosexuality.  While it sounds vulgar for many to even consider, this argument is no different than a polygamist, rapist, pedophile or adulterer placing their entire identity in the related activities.  We would consider them silly…or would we.  History shows many societies devolve to a place of sexual free-for-all right before the culture collapses.  There are many that justify their actions because they say “it is who I am”.  They then go so far as to say they are a protected people group who deserve the same “rights” as others.

TRUTH IS, humans will use anything to find a sense of identity; jobs, gangs, education, fraternities, other people, drugs and yes, even sexual behavior.  God wants us to find our Identity in Christ and in Him alone.  When we as Christians disapprove of homosexuality, the person who has chosen to use that as a source of identity takes personal offense.  In their mind we are attacking them directly.  We are not, but that is how it is perceived.

2) Sex

Well, that’s what it really is all about right?  It is the preferred method of identification for many.  Whether Gay, Lesbian, Bi, Trans etc., it is all relating to sexual anatomy and practices. A human is so much more than their sexual anatomy.  A human is so much more than sexual activities.  Yet, this is what the big fight is over.  When sex is the most important thing in an individual’s mind, they assume any talk of sex is directly regarding them.  In the mind of the person who sees sex as most important, and justifies their particular favorite flavor of it, Christians are merely “homophobic”.  That’s a moniker used to vilify people and is just code for “I say you hate a certain type of people, so I can now justifiably attack you”.

TRUTH IS, God’s word does not so much condemn “homo” sexuality as much as it commands “HOLY” sexuality.  There is a long list of “deviations” in the Bible asserting what God says is inappropriate in the bedroom.  This forbidden list explicitly includes sex with: a sibling, step-parents, spouses not your own, people of the same gender and even animals.  The fact God has to tell us NOT to have sex with an animal shows just how quick and how far we will deviate from HOLY SEXUALITY.  Christians are not “homophobic”, nor are they “against gay’s”…not real Christians anyway.  But they do take a stand against anything that is not HOLY sexuality.  Be it adultery or pedophilia or fornication, or yes, even homosexuality – Christians must promote God’s version of sex.  When someone does not understand or accept Holy Sexuality, they assume any talk of deviant behavior is a direct personal attack. It is not, but that is how it is perceived.

3) Love

Ahhh, love.  If it is done in the name of “love” it must be good right? Who can control love?  How can we prevent someone from loving?  How can we help who we “fall” in love with?  How can anyone deny lovers? Surely anyone who speaks AGAINST love is evil right?

While Hollywood promotes those concepts to us from the time we watch a Disney movie all the way up to the News, none of it is based on Biblical truth.  This also is a great way to justify wrong doing.  In the end, it is just another trick of the enemy to vilify someone who speaks of Holiness. If you speak against someone’s so-called love, in their mind, you justify an attack by them, the “accused”.

The problem is most people have more of Pepe Le Pew’s version of love in their mind than the Bible’s actual descriptions.  First let me say what love is NOT.  In the Bible, Love is NOT associated with: a feeling, an emotion, physical affection, sex, infatuation, butterflies in the stomach, beating hearts, lust or desire. Though love can trigger and influence any of those things, none are part of love’s DNA.

Love is spiritual, not emotional.  We know this because God is Love and God is a Spirit and the Fruit of His Spirit is Love (and other stuff). And despite what Oprah teaches, the Bible reveals to us that nothing emotionally or feelings-based is spiritual or related to love.  God is not a feeling and our relationship with him is not feeling based.  Though for some, that is the extent of their relationship with God, and therefore they mistake love and every other element of the spiritual for some emotion.

Most importantly Love is a choice.  We know this because God commands us WHO and WHAT to love, and who and what NOT to love.  If somehow, love were this uncontrollable thing, He would not tell us to control it. But it is controllable, so he does command us to do so.

Still, “love” is the excuse for homosexuality. Ironically it is also the excuse for couples living together, for adulterers, for pedophiles and even for some rapists. The claim of something done in the name of “love” is the last resort of the rebel. It is the closest they can say to it being done in the “name of God” without treading into blasphemy.  Deep down, they know they are wrong, but don’t want anyone to challenge it.  Who can challenge the person who says “God told me to”?  Well, only a fool uses that loosely (and there are many fools around).  But the realist knows that is a dangerous game, so, let’s just say “LOVE” told me it was OK (with heavy emphasis that God is Love).

Did God tell you to do this? “God didn’t tell me NOT TO! (Wink, wink.)  I mean if God didn’t want me with this person, He would step in…right?”  Anyone who believes that can just go ask Samson that Question. Judges 13-16 (spoiler alert –God doesn’t step in and Samson dies and misses his destiny.)

“IT’S FOR LOVE!” they cry. We all know that is not true, but it is the excuse they use anyway.  It is the excuse they use to revile, hate and attack anyone speaking of God’s true love which CAN NOT be separated from His Truth and Holiness.

Love that does not face or admit the truth is not really love at all.  God disallows homosexual activity in the Bible, plain and simple.  However, we must respect our friends and relatives who choose to live such a lifestyle.  In the same way we respect anyone who sins.  However, homosexuals (and Christians) must not confuse love and support for approving, condoning or encouraging sinful behavior.

You do not have to agree with a person’s actions to be supportive of them. Choose to love homosexuals, just as we choose to love anyone who chooses to sin.  Never endorse the sin in the process, though. For those who redefine love and sex or place their identity in such false beliefs, odds are they will get totally offended and decide to no longer associate with you.

If they are Christians, you have to disassociate with them.

But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler—not even to eat with such a one.  For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church?  But those who are outside, God judges. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES.

– 1 Corinthians 5:11-13

Still we must thank God for His great love for them and wish them peace in Christ.  It’s ok, should they decide to leave. Hopefully they come back. Either way, keep praying that at some point they see the light of the truth before it’s too late.

If you are dealing with homosexuality, or know someone who is, a good book for you to read would be a book by my friend Christopher & Angely Yuan called OUT OF A FAR COUNTRY.

You can get a copy from our bookstore: